Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Feb.16th 2011

 Well I've always been able to pick myself up and dust myself off thru anything that has been delt to me. I've handeled all the trials and tribulations as they have come.
  But this one is something I can't overcome.....I have given up !!
  My tools have been sold(thanks Jay),my truck and trailer have been transfered to a friend(enjoy them Rich),all my guns are gone(Lil' brother has most),I only have two weeks worth of clothing(less laundry),my cremation has been set-up and prepaid. I feel that all things are in order.. 
  Feb.14th. I went to see my brain surgen one last time. As far as he was concerned,if I didn't do radiation or chemo,he no longer had a reason to see me. At least he's not a salesman !!!
  Pain med.s are doing good so far,,I will need one of those oxygen makers in time.But thats down the road I guess.
  With all the people that wanted to hear about this crap,,It's surprising that I have so few followers or comments...Oh well.
  My nose is starting to run alot and there's a familar pain starting in my head just like before the surgery.CRAP !!
  I pray every night that I won't wake up in the morning.But God just dosen't need me just yet I guess. I might seem like a coward, but I don't want the pain that I've heard about.

8 comments:

  1. Never ever think of yourself as a coward. You are stronger than you think - look at what you have dealt with so far! Hang in there hun and keep me posted....lots of hugs n prayers

    ReplyDelete
  2. Sending hugs n luv your way. Wish there was more we could do. You are not a coward!!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. don't think you're giving up, you sure as hell aren't a coward, you are playing the cards you've been dealt. one hand at a time. love you...

    ReplyDelete
  4. Used a few of your tools today Bill. I smile every time I see your name on them. They will be a constant reminder of you and the part of your dash that I am associated with.
    You are a strong and respectful man who has been dealt a difficult hand and you're dealing with it your way. To me, that's strength not weakness.
    Be strong. See you soon .

    ReplyDelete
  5. sweet bill, i hope today is a good day. everyone IS interesting in you and how you're doing. there is nothing "cowardly" that you are going through right now ... you are a strong and wonderful man who we love very much. it seems hard to believe that you've only been in our lives for such a short time .... i feel as though it has been my joy to have known you so much longer! stay strong and remember that we all love and need you .... most espcially that sweet Larry. either you come and see us soon for lunch, or we'll come and see you. love you.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Hey my friend, hope today is a good one, how's Larry doin,lets try to get together so I can visit with you, and meet Larry, miss you much, love you more......

    ReplyDelete
  7. Hey Bill, You cross my thoughts often. I'm praying for you. Talked to my Dad today. He said he had talked to you and was planning on seeing you at some "event" tomorrow. Hope that pans out for both of you. Hang in there. I can only imagine.

    ReplyDelete
  8. After reading over the posts, I remembered the comments you made me about living the dash--we all have a birth date---we all have a death date---what really matters is our DASH and you are playing a shitty hand very, very well. Hugs.

    ReplyDelete