4/23/11

Well my friends,,
  It's 9:30 Saturday night,and I'm feeling pretty good. The nurses have been playing with my medications and it seems to have done some good. At first the dosage wasen't enough and I wanted to die ASAP. Then it went too far,and I slept for almost four days straight (grrrrr). She decreased it some Friday, and when my head somewhat cleared, here I am!!! Almost ready to go dance (ha,ha,ha,)
   The medication in my pac is a mixture of pain killers which includes Dilaudid every 30 minutes. Also I take a tab called Dexamethason (for brain swelling). And oh yea, heres a joke,,They give me a Happy pill every day !! (not really working).
   Did anyone know that all that pain killer stuff makes you constipated? Well I do now!! Thank goodness for prune juice and milk of magnesian (16oz. + 2tbls mixed). The pills they gave me for it did't work. I'll stick with the home remedys.
   I gots me a hair cut !! Nicer to take care of I guess. It dont part worth a darn tho.
 The tattoos are new too, (do not resusatate)same on both sides of my neck, so the paramedics can see and understand, just let me go to my LORD !!
   Looking for all these keys on here makes my eyes sore, so I think I'll sign off soon, but I like checking in here sometimes.  I don't really remember all that I've written down in this blog thing. so I'm sorry if I have repeted myself a bit.
  Friends,,,hug and kiss your loved ones, forgive an enemy, praise our GOD, and STAY healthy !!
                                                                 Bill
                                                            (Whisper) 

 

04/11/11

Now darn it !!!
    Larry needs a loving inside new home !! He's a great doggie,house trained,has alot of training,used to go to work with me, problem is that Larry cant read nor wright,talk nor do math.(yes I'm having one of those few good days)
    My Lil' brother's doggie decided that she wanted to be the alpha doggie at her home,so that didnt work too well.No falt of Ron,Bailey,Larry,no me,,just life.
    My Lady friend is taking care of larry rite now,but she has 2 other doggies now.They are basicly outside doggies,and Larry is'nt.(my fault)
    Where I live now, I have to take him for walks all the time and CRAP !!   I can't hardly walk nowdays.
    For my own heart and Larry's too. We need help!!!
    He's 3 years old,around 75 lbs,hairy,white,brown,tan,and a little black.Part Aussie shepard and part Pit bull(the Aussie is the predominant one).Lays,sits,stays,fetchs,tugs,Shakes paws,stands up and boxes (both paws).
   Jill has been trying to get him to talk a little,but he dosent seem to have much to say yet,But just wait,,,he will someday!

   I'm not asking for $$$,,just a good home and peice of mind for us both,Please call or e-mail me if u have any questions. Or maybe just suggestions on what I may do.
   BTW,today it's 4am monday and I'm doing good this morning,Hospice delevered a new machine yesterday,and some techs are going to install it today. I pray this is gonna work!! And I pray that none of you have to ever go thru this stuff!!
   Remember,,hug your loved ones,rub your pets,make a new friend,make up with an enemy,and  praise our LORD!!!
                                  Bill
                              (Whisper) 

Pics of my DASH

I HOPE!!!

March 31st and last thoughts

This is just a few thoughts while I'm able to realize what I'm thinking and able to put them down..
   Jill,,,Feb.16th,when we met again after 11 years.Has been some of the best days of my life.I still don't understand why you are here by my side.It's not my good looks nor any far flung promisied future. I love you.
   Tim,,, The bestist student anyone toolmaker could hope to ever have.I know that your not folling thu with the training,but at this point and time you could keep up with some of the best. Sorry I never met your lady.
   Uncle Bill,,,We have been thru thick and thin together,and it was all very good.I know that you have been calling a few times a week,but please just remember the good times.Kiss Ma Ma for me,she's a great lady..
   Tanya,,We never met in person,but with a father like Uncle Bill,you just have to be a great lady..Hug those kids and your old man for me,Please..Matt 6:34
  Chris,,,You have always been there for me.I whish that I could say the same,We had good times and bad.But you were in my heart.Kiss that Charlie for me and a big hug to Hoss..
   Amiee,,,Ah that smile!! You have no idea how happy you made me when I would see your bright face in the morning at work..And of course those Star Bucks cookie things.
  Mr.Jay,,,I think it was a God send,when I saw your add on line.I have never worked with anyone that I enjoyed so much,
Thank you for putting up with me and Larry the dog.I was soo suprised about 5&diner at the hosp. Wished we could have done it again,but health said no,,Grrr I'm gonna keep my eye on you,,hahahah
  Cindy & Chris,,Great friends,good parties,nice bike,and always good thoughts,Great machinest,Keep Texas on their toes!!!
   Rhonda,,,What can I say?Youve been someone special in my heart and told me to share these experiences whith those who might care.You have called at my worst times and brought me around a little.Jill likes you too.Give those doggies and your husband belly rubbs for me.
   Steve,,,I didnt know you were on here ,,sorry,,I guess by now you have read my short story Now you know.Tell the guys at work Hi  & bye for me,
   For those of you that read this but didnt choose to follow,,thats ok,I wish you would have.
  Take care and GOD bless,
               Bill
  

march 21st 2011

  This past week was bad. Health wise. Hospice has me taking more meds and morphine every hour.
  When I stand up I get really dizzie, Saturday Jill helped me walk around some like I was some drunk.
  Sunday, I had my first real seizure, It sucked!! Larry the dog stayed beside me all the time.Then The trowing up started,that sucks too.
  I guess that the seizure is the first of many.Then the tumor will push harder against my brain, and the insainity will begin. By then.Hospice says they can keep me asleep most of the time.
  I am having trouble  hitting these keys some times so this might be my last entry.
  Remember !!!  Kiss and hug your loved ones,pet your animals,cause they love you,forgive an enemy.
  GOD has a plan for us all,we dont know what it might be,,we just need to accept it and follow it.
                         Bill

March 5th 11

Hi friends:
  Well here I go again.Thursday morning,I went and had that PET scan done. Radition and all..(and no Larry the dog wase'nt involved).
  Friday,I went to Banner Good Sam.and had a 3 hour MRI.with and without dye.
  Later that day I saw the radition doc. and he explained the results of the scans..CRAP !!!!    The tumor the brain surgen took out after Christmas is back and the same size !!(4cm) The tumor in my left lung is just a little larger(11cm},so smoking aint the problem!! The PET scan found a few more,
The right adrenal gland is totally cancerous and non functional.It also found a small tumor near my colon(I thought I was done with that one).
  I sort of cornered the doc. in my own sweet way, and requested a time line.At first he wanted to do full rad.treatment to give me a few months,I told him that he was nothing but a darned salesman, praying on peoples hopes.
  After we got that crap out of the way,I was told about 2 months would be about it.The lung wouldn't do me in, but the brain tumor would get so painful that I would soon become an invalid and insane(oh well).
  The silly doctor finally gave up trying to make more money and had Hospice of the Valley contact me.
  Friday late afternoon a very nice lady from hospice came by the house to interview me. I guess she needed to know about me and Larry, so she could set me up with a nurse that we could get along with.
  Monday,hospice is sending a social worker here to get my brother Ron,and my friend Rich,to sign paper work for my care,meds,and money.Larry can't sign his name yet,so I have to have a neighbor sign as a witness.
  I have decided to have absoulty hospital stuff again.So all the paper work involves DO NOT RESUSATATE. There will be a doctor visiting when the nurses cant do certian things.
Cool !! when it gets really bad,,he can give me DILAUDID.
 I have already filled out forms,that when I get stupid,they are to keep me asleep untill I pass.And they can do that
  Enough about that stuff right now..Please,,,for me,,
Kiss and hug your spouse,,think hard before you scold the kids,talk to old friends,and say a prayer for everyone you know,,,
  Looks like I have only about 6 weeks to keep this blog going,(I'll get really stupid on here)so I guess I better wright more often.
  Just something to think about,,some days I feel too good to die,but think about the people in bike wrecks that felt good too.
                       Love you all

Feb.28th 2011

Hi friends;
   Sorry about not adding anything latley,but there just hasent been anything..
   Well maybe there has been,,A lady friend (ex-wife),contacted me on Facebook,,,COOL !! I was concerned about meeting up with her but Hey!! what did I have to lose?
It's been great so far, Jill dosent ask anything of me and I dont ask anything of her..Seems like we should have stayed together thru all those years past.
  Saturday, we went to that Lost Dutchmans thing in Apache Juction. A very dear friend of mine was playing on stage all afternoon !! If anyone can get a chance to see him and his band,,PLEASE do !! Also we met up with my bestist friend,,Bill..He looked great !!! Jill and I danced one dance and walked around abit,Then I spoiled things by getting tired,,,Grrrrr
  The headaches are still sneaking up on me(maybe 'cause I cut back on my meds). And now I'm starting to feel the crap in my chest,,Seems like I'm breathing alittle faster to get my air. And my left side of my chest feels alittle heaver(like someone is pressing on me). Oh well one day at a time,Right?
  I taught Larry the dog to stay off my bed, 'cause now I call him Harry Larry( he's shedding all over!!).He will be going to my lil' brothers home when I'm gone and he dosent allow his doggie on the bed.But now,when I get undressed for the night Larry scrunches up my clothes and sleeps on them.What a dog I have !!
  I miss all of my friends, and wish I could share time with you all..To those that have called,,Thank you..To those of you that take the time to comment,,Thank you too..I love reading them !!
  Please remember,,make your peace with GOD now !!!  You just never know (do you?). I did along time ago,even when some people didnt see it that way.In the book of Matthew,chapter 6,,Jesus told his buddies that they shouldnt run around prayin and singing so's everyone could hear,,Only GOD needs to hear you,( it goes something like that)
  I'll try to get on here alittle more if my friends wanna read
                            Love you all !!!